During school today we had an assembly about ownership. The students put it on and part of it went as follows:
Seth, Mike, and John are on stage making up excuses as to why they didn't finish their reports.
A student jumps to his desk and throws his blue, silk, cape over his shoulder revealing a superman-esque shirt with an O instead of an S and hits the Superman pose.
"Behold, I am Ownership Man!"
Everyone quivers on stage in pure awe of the curly haired boy on the rickety desk.
"Oh! It's Ownerships Man!"
"These students haven't been taking ownership of their actions. Let me show you some examples to help you understand! Example 1: Seth go and slap Mike." Seth does this. All the student body claps and the teachers look worried while they glance around to be sure the principal is there so they don't have to have the responsibility of saying anything. "Example 2: Mike, go tell John that his project was terrible and that there's no way you can write a report on it. Don't make him cry, he's sensitive" Mike does this, John pretends to cry, again the students clap and cheer while laughing. "Example 3: John, repeat after me, "I didn't do my report because I was lazy."
John replies "Ownership man, I didn't do my report because Mike got in my way."
Ownership man: "No No No! Again!"
John "Ownership man, I didn't do my report because you're lazy."
Ownership man: "Repeat what I said John!"
John finally repeats it and the audience remains dead.
Ownership man looks to the audience, "Which of these was right? Which showed ownership?" Mass chaos erupts as students all yell out different numbers (most voting for the slap example 1). The students on stage are a little lost as to what to do and the chaos continues until someone on stage timidly says "Number 3" and decides they want to leave; the other students on stage follow and the teachers clap to help the awkward misery end.
The lesson here?
A. Mass groups of students never react the way other students expect them to.
B. Students always find bad examples much funnier and therefore use them often.
C. Slapstick humor will win over pretty much everything in a popularity voting contest.
D. Not even teachers want to take ownership of some situations. :)
At the end of the assembly we had a much funnier event. LPA celebrated Pi day last Friday and part of the festivities (along with amazing amounts of pie) was a contest to see who could write, from memory, the most digits of pi in five minutes. At the end of the assembly they announced the winners. One student wrote 130 digits correctly with second place at 127- super impressive! One of the prizes was lunch with the principal (somehow this didn't get a very high level of excitement- shocking). The other prize was a little better: All the male faculty members went to the front and stood in a line. Each of the top six students got a cream pie they could rub in anyone's face. It was seriously hilarious- again, total slapstick, but it even got to the teachers. The students chose different tactics- some were smooth and sly, one was painfully slow, letting the anticipation and dread grow for the teachers, one student slipped and fell, Mr. Rhodes saved her pie, helped her up, and with one fluid motion she took it from his hand and rubbed it in his face. So much for chivalry, but still funny. Among the honored group to get sugar facials were the principal, the janitor (the entire student body started chanting his name), the drama teacher (who of course absolutely loved all the attention but acted as though he didn't), and a math teacher who is obviously the winning student's role model and hero. It was actually pretty cute and made me proud to be with teachers who would all be willing for this.
And with all of those thousands of words, I wish you all Happy St. Patricks Day and good night!
No comments:
Post a Comment